3 month Monkey

Lelia Drew is now just over 3 months old.

I was downloading pictures onto our new computer including over 500 of Lelia's birth (can you tell she's our first?!? 500 pics in 2 days IS a bit excessive, I do have to say!) As I shuffled through the images, all the feelings of her birth came rushing back. All the pain, the pushing, the moment I first saw her face, exploring her tiny fingers and toes, watching my husband transform into a father, pride, accomplishment, and utter AWE.

Three months later, although it's cliche, I gotta say it... I don't remember a time when she wasn't part of our lives. It seems as though she's always been with us. Always meant to be our little girl. Every day is different...some days are more challenging than others...but I've never been so happy in my entire life. I love waking up each morning to her smile and giggle. Watching her grow and discover new things each day. Snickering as she 'talks' herself to sleep at night.

I just LOVE this little girl of mine. Love her to pieces!

What she's been up to:

• Giggling and laughing up a storm. She's such a happy baby and her laugh is adorable (I'm biased, I know). I'm hoping to get some video of her laughing. She's such a riot!

• Starting to grab things. Tre and I have been waiting anxiously for quite some time for her to start trying to grab things. She plays on her jungle mat quite well now and grabs at the hippo, giraffe, monkey and banana. It's hilarious to watch her explore the world with her hands. I'm still not convinced she really knows HOW to control her hands, but I think she's becoming more aware that they are actually attached TO her!

• Taking a bottle really well! And after running the bottles under warm water and heating up water in the microwave, Tre broke down and purchased a bottle warmer. Bottles in 2 minutes...evidently it's wonderful cuz he can't stop singing praises. As a 'bottle warmer' in my own right, I will never get to enjoy this new toy but am glad that this tidbit of modern technology eases the bottle routine around here!

• Likes to read books, listen to music and (ahem) watch DVD's on the TV. Oh, I know how unwholesome the TV watching is...but some days when Tre and I are completely exhausted, sitting like drooling vegetables in front of a mediocre DVD is just heavenly! Hopefully we're not rotting her brain too much!

• Enjoys going for walks in the stroller. She's quite a nature girl. When we're outside, she watches the squirrels and birds and 'talks' a lot. With cold weather moving in, I'm trying to figure out how to keep her warm and bundled up enough to enjoy Autumn walks together.

Target achieved...going in to GRAB

Ah...success!

Hey!

Happy girl!

Firsts...

It's been a week of 'firsts' for us here at Cl8n Camp.

*Lelia's first visit to the pumpkin patch.

A sunny October day, beautiful pumpkins and nice family time...photos to follow.

*My first visit to the animal emergency hospital with a sick dog and a newborn.
Let's just say it was a L-O-N-G day, just to find out Ellie had kennel cough. Big whoop!

*My first day back at work since Lelia's birth.

After some initial watery eyes, once I got to work I was far too busy to spend time missing my sweet Monkey. I can say...I have NEVER been more excited to come home!! Seeing Lelia's happy little face after a long day is the best thing EVER!

*My Mom's first day of watching Lelia when I was at work.

She'll be watching Lelia from time-to-time on Monday's. They had a good time together reading books, going for a walk and playing and I'm so grateful that Lelia will get to have a close relationship with Koko. Lucky little girl!

*Tre's first day of watching Lelia when was at work.

Tre was pretty nervous about his first day of daddy day care and after a bit of a rough start, they are figuring it out. They ran errands together, watched Pokoyo and Baby Einstein, read some books and even went to a Mommy Matinee (more on that next!). We are blessed that Tre and I can work our schedules to divide Lelia's care between us. I'm thankful he's willing to stay at home with Lelia so I can work. He's such a good Daddy!

*Lelia's first movie.

Tre took Lelia to a Mommy Matinee to 'watch' the newest Harry Potter movie. Despite the fact that he hates that they call it a "Mommy" matinee (Dad's stay home with kids too...can't they call it a Papa Picture?) he was mildly entertained and he got a decent break as Lelia slept for most of the movie.

All in all, despite all the change/chaos/disruption this week, the transitions have been fairly smooth. Lelia continues to sleep well (10/11PM - 7/8AM) and has easily taken a bottle for feedings when I'm at work. YEAH! Tre has been settling into his role of Daddy daycare and despite a few crazy moments, is enjoying his time one-on-one with kiddo. After some initial doubts about my own return to work, I'm very appreciative of the time I get to spend working at a job that I enjoy.

I think we are well on our way to finding our balance. We know it's a daily thing...but we're off to a rockin' start!

The news around here...

Lelia

Our little sweetie will be 11 weeks old tomorrow. She had her 2 month doctor's appointment yesterday (2 weeks late, obviously) and we got the good news that she's a healthy happy little girl (which we long suspected but was nice to have some medical affirmation of). Here's a quick run-down of what our little one is up to...

• holding her head up with amazing control, will sit with minimal assistance and likes to stand up on her sturdy little legs...with our arms securely around her belly, of course. She's working pretty hard on trying to sit up from a laying down position...oh mercy!
• talking non-stop. Specific things that incite chatter are...people, the stickers on the wall by her changing table, Yuk Duck, dogs and anything shiny. If you talk back to her she'll keep up the banter for quite awhile. A total riot!
• giggling/laughing more and more. By far my FAVORITE thing!
• is 12 lbs 15oz and 23 3/4 inches of chubby monkey at yesterday's appointment, putting her in the 83rd percentile for weight and 82nd percentile for height (or so they say). Holy moley! She's obviously eating well and growing like a weed!

Happy girl

With Papa

Love that her tongue is hanging out in this one

Some time with Mama

Family photo

In other news

I return to work next Monday Oct 12th. I was really excited to return to my job part-time and stay at home with Lelia part-time. But due to some crazy office politics I'm going to end up working more than I wanted to...and am now NOT so excited about my return to the working world.

We have chosen to not put Lelia in daycare. So, I will only work on the days when Tre is home and my Mom will pick up 3 Monday's in the next few months to help out. I'm finding out that our decision to not put Lelia in daycare and instead divide her care between us, is really challenging us to really look at our priorities.

So, with only 6 days to go before I'm back to starting IV's, hanging chemo and helping guide people through all the emotions and physical challenges that come with a cancer diagnosis, I'm feeling quite anxious and overwhelmed. I'm not sure how I'm going to balance working 4 days a week at a very emotionally and physically draining job and also be 100% present/interactive with Lelia the other 3 days while Tre is at work.

Tre and I have been talking a lot about all of this and I'm sure many other couples have faced the decision of how to best balance work and home life. Daycare or no daycare? Who will work? How much? When do we, as individuals, rest and refuel? Is there any way to give my all at both work and at home without exhausting myself? Am I taking on too much or expecting too much of myself? Will our decision to have both of us working compromise Lelia in any way?

For now, I'll go back to work and we'll see how our system runs. If things aren't working, we'll have to readjust and reprioritize. The bottom line is that I just want what's best for our little girl. I want to be present for her and also do something (working) that fulfills me. This is where I'm finding it difficult to meld my different roles as a mother, wife and employee, etc.

We are trying to find our balance...